** Over ONE MILLION copies sold **

An achingly authentic and raw portrait of love, regret, and the life-altering impact of the relationships we hold closest to us, this coming of age romance bestseller is perfect for fans of Colleen Hoover, Jenny Han and Lynn Painter.

If he had been with me, everything would have been different

Autumn and Finn used to be inseparable. But then something changed. Or they changed. Now, they do their best to ignore each other.

Autumn has her boyfriend, Jamie, and her close-knit group of friends. And Finn has become that boy at school, the one everyone wants to be around.

That still doesn't stop how Autumn feels every time she and Finn cross paths, and the growing, nagging thought that maybe things could have been different. Maybe they should be together.

But come August, things will change forever. And as time passes, Autumn will be forced to confront how else life might have been different if they had never parted ways

Captivating and heartbreaking, If He Had Been with Me is perfect for readers looking for:

• Friends to lovers romance
• Contemporary teen romance books
• Unputdownable and binge-worthy novels
• Complex, emotional young adult stories
• TikTok books

Tropes
Coming of Age
Friends to Lovers
Fated Mates
Cruel Love

Also by Laura Nowlin:
If Only I Had Told Her
This Song is (Not) for You

The story of a mother grieving the sudden loss of her twenty-one-year-old child - from the bestselling memoirist of Don't Let's Go to the Dogs Tonight

** Pulitzer Prize Finalist 2025 in Memoir/Autobiography **

'Truly extraordinary' HELEN MACDONALD

A profound and gripping memoir about surviving unexpected, devastating loss SUNDAY TIMES

A mesmeric celebration... Will help others surviving loss  surviving life' NEW YORK TIMES

Its midsummer in Wyoming and Alexandra Fuller is barely hanging on. Grieving her father and pining for her home country of Zimbabwe, reeling from a midlife breakup, freshly sober and piecing her way uncertainly through a volatile new relationship with a younger woman, Alexandra vows to get herself back on even keel.

And then  suddenly and incomprehensibly  her son Fi, at twenty-one years old, dies in his sleep.

From a sheep wagon deep in the mountains of Wyoming to a grief sanctuary in New Mexico to a silent meditation retreat in Alberta, Canada, Alexandra journeys up and down the spine of the Rocky Mountains in an attempt to find how to grieve herself whole. By turns disarming, devastating and unexpectedly, blessedly funny, Alexandra recounts the wild medicine of painstakingly grieving a child in a culture that has no instructions for it.